Company descriptions examples: what to evaluate

Company descriptions examples worth studying aren't published sample plans. They are the descriptions of your own business that already exist in four or five other places, written for different purposes, and mostly disagreeing with each other.

Collect them before you write anything. The disagreements are the material. Once the disagreements are on the table, the next job is writing a company description that settles them in seven timed steps.

What to take away

Seven checks for evaluating company descriptions

The same business, described five ways

Print all five. Read them side by side and mark every place they differ: a different address, a different name, an activity described narrowly in one and broadly in another, a permitted use in the lease that does not cover something you now do.

Record the settled version once, in the fact block set out in the descriptions template, so the plan draws from one place.

Each difference is either an error to correct at the source or a fact the plan must explain. Both are cheaper to handle now than in the middle of an application, where a reader who spots one of them starts checking the rest of the document.

Three rewrites

The pattern is always the same: replace the adjective with the fact it was standing in for.

Promotional. "We are a leading provider of innovative cleaning solutions dedicated to exceeding our customers' expectations across the region."

Factual. "The company provides contract cleaning to commercial offices near its depot, under monthly agreements billed in arrears."

The second version is duller and considerably more persuasive, because every clause can be checked.

Vague about structure. "Our family business has grown steadily and now operates from several sites."

Factual. "The business operates from [number] leased units in [area]. [Name] owns [percentage] and works full time in the business; [name] owns the remainder and does not work in it, which the team section explains in more detail. A separate company owned by the same two people holds the building at [address] and charges rent to this one."

The related-party arrangement is normal. Disclosed, it is a footnote. Discovered by a lender in your accounts, it is a credibility problem for the whole document.

Aspiration written as fact. "We operate a fleet serving three counties with plans for national expansion."

Factual. "The business currently serves three counties. National expansion is planned after it secures an additional vehicle and a driver, and the funding request covers those requirements."

Same ambition, but now the reader can tell what exists from what is intended, which is the single most common thing this section gets wrong.

Where to find other people's descriptions worth reading

State registry records. Search the business entity record maintained by the relevant state's Secretary of State or equivalent filing office. Depending on the state, the record may show the legal name, agent, status, or filing history; compare the fields the state actually publishes with how the business describes itself publicly. Registry records show what the state collects, but company description mistakes start when the written version disagrees with the filed one.

Franchise disclosure documents. The Federal Trade Commission's Franchise Rule (16 C.F.R. Part 436) governs franchise disclosure documents. Where you can review one, compare its description of the business model with the plan; the document is for disclosure rather than sales.

Annual reports from large companies. For example, Amazon's annual report is filed as a Form 10-K with the Securities and Exchange Commission and is available through EDGAR. Skip the letter at the front and read the section describing the business and its segments. It is written for people who will check it, and the register is exactly the one you want, at a scale you can ignore.

Loan and grant application forms. For Small Business Administration 7(a) loan applications, SBA Form 1919 collects borrower information. Federal grant applications commonly use an SF-424 form through Grants.gov; check the specific program's instructions. The questions tell you what the reader wants stated, which is worth more than any sample answer.

What transfers and what does not

The sentence construction transfers. The order transfers. The habit of putting the checkable clause first transfers.

Nothing factual transfers. Not their ownership split, not their premises arrangement, not their entity type, and above all not their wording, which reviewers who read this material daily recognize on sight. The general rule for reading any sample, and what it is safe to take from one, is set out in the plan examples guide.

Read your draft back as a stranger

Cover the name at the top of your finished section and read it. Can you say what the business sells, who owns it, where it operates from and how far along it is? If any of the four is missing, the section has been written as an advertisement, which is the failure mode the descriptions guide covers at length.

Then hand it to somebody who has never heard of the business and ask them to tell you what it does. Their sentence is often better than yours, and it is usually shorter.

Common questions

Should I include a description of a previous business I ran?

Only if it explains something about this one, such as relevant experience or a customer list you brought with you. Keep it to a clause. A previous business that failed is worth naming plainly if the reader will find it anyway, and they usually will.

My website says something different from my filing. Which do I change?

Usually the website, because the filing is the record. But check which is actually wrong first. If the filing describes an activity you no longer do, that is a filing to update rather than a website to trim.

How do I describe a business with two unrelated activities?

Separately, with the revenue split between them and a sentence on why one company holds both. Blending them into a single description is what makes a reader suspect the split is unfavorable.

Is it worth paying for a sample plan in my industry?

Rarely for this section. The structure is public, the fields are the same for everyone, and the only part that matters is your own record, which no sample contains.